Can't catch this

The late great basketball coach Al McGuire had a vocabulary all his own. He called a close game “white knuckler.” The point when a game’s outcome became clear was “tap city.” An opposing team’s big center was an “aircraft carrier.” And a small, very quick point guard was a “water bug.”

If you live on a lake, you know that last term is apt, because nothing is quicker than a water bug – more specifically a water beetle, or more definitively a whirligig beetle. You’ve certainly seen clusters of these oval, shiny black shapes darting on the surface of still water, making tiny, intersecting V wakes.

As kids we liked to catch things – frogs, crayfish, butterflies, minnows. I can solemnly swear I never caught a whirligig beetle, not even with a scoop net. They are just too fast. These little beetles are rather flat and streamlined for life on the water. They have two sets of compound eyes that let them see both above and below the water (someone ought to design a snorkel mask that gives humans such capability).

They have fairly long forelegs, which they usually hold to the front. The middle and hind legs, shaped like short, flat paddles, provide locomotion (though to see these bugs swim with such smoothness and agility, you’d swear they were somehow jet-powered).

They have chewing mouthparts, and they feed on smaller insects that fall into the water, or on dead plant or animal matter. They can also dive underwater to catch prey. There are about 700 species of whirligig beetles in the world, and more than 50 can be found in the United States and Canada. It doesn’t matter exactly which species you see on your lake. They look and act pretty much alike. Just enjoy the beauty of their frenetic choreography – and don’t even bother trying to catch one.